vignettes of this and that

One more day at home and then it’s off to Scotland I go… I’m not sure what the dominating emotion I’m experiencing right now is. Excitement? Nervousness? Anxiety? Euphoria?

Maybe a combination of everything…

I can’t help but think about how easy it would have been to just stay at Duke this semester, nestled in the best dorm on campus with all my classes within a 3-minute walk, and a great job to pay for all the additional expenses. I could’ve stayed, and taken a semester of easy classes because I’m basically done with most of my requirements. I could’ve stayed, and enjoyed more late-night bonding sessions with my friends. I could’ve stayed, and tented and gone to more basketball games. I could’ve stayed, and taken part in intaking the Betas. I could’ve stayed, and maybe gotten a little. I could’ve stayed, and had another semester at the bestcollegecampus ever.

But I chose to go. To put myself through all this anticipation and anxiety and doubts about will I make friends will people like me will I fit in will I freeze to death will I understand all the accents will I fail my classes will people think I’m weird will it be worth it?

It’s like starting college all over again.

The closer the date looms, the more nervous and less excited I become. I don’t know what to expect. I don’t even know what to hope for.

Ahhhh it would’ve been so much easier to just plant my butt back at Duke this semester.

But the best things in life aren’t easy. So for now, I’m content with the possibility that the upcoming few months may just be the best ones yet.