vignettes of this and that

**Okay so I wrote a post but then it kind of disappeared and I’m too lazy to retype everything so here’s a lamer version.

So I’ve been here for five days already. Sorry I have no pictures… was too scared of seeming too touristy.

Some observations/thoughts/random rambles:

• The architecture is so old and lovely. I actually think it’s more gorgeous than Duke.
• I have no sense of direction. When I was going through Arcadia’s orientation the first couple of days here, I just followed the other Americans around assuming they knew where they were going. The first day I moved into my flat, I ate candy for dinner because it was 10pm and I’d just woken up (still not over jet lag…) and had no idea where the nearest shop was. The next day, it took me half an hour to find the Tesco’s Express near my building even though in actuality it’s a 3 minute walk.
• HOWEVER, I feel like I’m slowly gaining a sense of direction. Went roaming around with my friend yesterday because she’d lost her phone on Friday and we went back to our hotel and a restaurant we’d eaten in to look for it. That whole journey kind of forced me to figure out streets and all that useful stuff. It also made me realize how many tourists are around here… 4 out of the 5 people we asked for help from were all like “sorry… I don’t live here.”
• This is SO different from Duke. I’d say it’s kind of akin to NYU’s campus, where it’s more integrated into the city. 
• I’m quite sure I’m going to end up losing weight this semester because 1) The path between where I live and the university central area is like one giant hill and 2) I am always starving because I’m too lazy to/can’t cook. One night, I drank on an empty stomach because I couldn’t bother to cook/eat anything before meeting up with a friend. But I WILL learn! Once I figure out where the nearest Asian supermarket is.
• My flatmates are all kind of anti-social. One is from Wales and she’s very nice and I really like her but she’s always locked up in her room studying. One is also on exchange like me. She goes to Brown but transferred from Duke. We had a nice awkward moment. The third one is a full-time student here, but she’s from the US. So my flat is basically… American.
• I live on top of a bar. Well, not my block specifically, but parts of my building is literally right above the bar. So it can get really loud, but I can deal with it because my building is one of the closest (if not the closest) to the university central area.
• I’m not quite sure how to work the heating in my room so I’m always freezing…
• I still haven’t unpacked. 
• I’m still jet lagged. Why am I still jet lagged? I hate you body.
• Today was FDOC and I went to a lot of classes because I’m not sure what I’m going to take. I’m ready to murder the MMS department back home because they haven’t answered any of my emails so I don’t even know if my credits would transfer for the business classes.

Sorry friends that this post tells you basically nothing about Scotland. Er let’s see if I can focus more on Scottish stuff: 

• Irn Bru. It’s the most popular soft drink here. It’s orange and tastes like bubblegum or some sort of candy and I know everyone loves it but after drinking about a third of a bottle I felt like I was going to puke. 
• There are tons tons tons of all sorts of different restaurants here. Indian, Chinese, Italian, etc etc. Today my friend (who’s on exchange for the whole year, so she’s been here since September) took me to this cute little Indian shop where I got a full meal for less than 4 pounds. It was yummy and awesome and cheap!
• There are like ten million pubs here lolz but I’m sure everyone already knew that. 
• It gets dark at 4pm. When it’s 5 it feels like it’s 10. I should adopt a more morning bird lifestyle, ushering in the new day and all that before it’s pitch black again. 
• Who wants a kilt suit?! JK totally not carrying one back in my already overweight suitcase.

I do feel like I’ve learned a lot about Scotland already, but I don’t know how to convey it in a way that won’t make you fall asleep. So one of these days I’m going to go traipsing across town again and take a bunch of touristy pictures and then you will see how beautiful and awesome it is.

And I will conclude on that note. I think it’s fitting to mention that it’s 7pm and I’m hungry and I don’t see myself dragging my butt out of my chair to go cook up some dinner until it’s 10 and I’m full out starving. And then I’ll probably just eat cereal or an apple. My parents would be appalled.

One more day at home and then it’s off to Scotland I go… I’m not sure what the dominating emotion I’m experiencing right now is. Excitement? Nervousness? Anxiety? Euphoria?

Maybe a combination of everything…

I can’t help but think about how easy it would have been to just stay at Duke this semester, nestled in the best dorm on campus with all my classes within a 3-minute walk, and a great job to pay for all the additional expenses. I could’ve stayed, and taken a semester of easy classes because I’m basically done with most of my requirements. I could’ve stayed, and enjoyed more late-night bonding sessions with my friends. I could’ve stayed, and tented and gone to more basketball games. I could’ve stayed, and taken part in intaking the Betas. I could’ve stayed, and maybe gotten a little. I could’ve stayed, and had another semester at the bestcollegecampus ever.

But I chose to go. To put myself through all this anticipation and anxiety and doubts about will I make friends will people like me will I fit in will I freeze to death will I understand all the accents will I fail my classes will people think I’m weird will it be worth it?

It’s like starting college all over again.

The closer the date looms, the more nervous and less excited I become. I don’t know what to expect. I don’t even know what to hope for.

Ahhhh it would’ve been so much easier to just plant my butt back at Duke this semester.

But the best things in life aren’t easy. So for now, I’m content with the possibility that the upcoming few months may just be the best ones yet.